Charlie Bartlett (2008)

Share this quote on facebook That's the best euphemism for getting the total crap kicked out of you that I've ever heard.

Share this quote on facebook [to his entire school] My name is Charlie Bartlett, and I'm no longer a virgin!

Share this quote on facebook [tapping head] Viagra! Virgin! Vino! Vagabond! Vagina!

Share this quote on facebook I'm just a stupid kid.

Share this quote on facebook Well duh dude, this place sucks. But I just worry that one day we're gonna look back at high school and wish we'd done something different.

Share this quote on facebook Oh, trust me doc, bringing psychiatric drugs and teenagers together is like opening a lemonade stand in the desert.

Share this quote on facebook [last line] Would you like to talk about it?

Share this quote on facebook I'm fit as a fucking fiddle.

Share this quote on facebook Never attack a drunk guy with a gun!

Share this quote on facebook [speaking of Charlie's father] There are worse crimes than tax evasion, you know.

Share this quote on facebook I'll see you in the sequel, bitch!

Share this quote on facebook [with Charlie, trying to convince Principal Gardener to let the drama group perform Kip's play] Sir, would it help if I said I'd be considerably less likely to end my life if you let us do this?

Share this quote on facebook Charlie: I think you're missing the big picture.
Kip: What big picture?
Charlie: The universe.
Kip: What about the universe?
Charlie: Well, the universe is a pretty big place.
Kip: Yeah. It's infinite, theoretically.
Charlie:Right, which means there's probably life on other planets.
Kip: Not life like we think, but yeah. Probably at least single-cell organisms.
Charlie: Well, see, that's my whole point. I mean you could've been born a single cell organism on the planet Zortex. In fact, given the odds, it's probably more likely, but you weren't. You we're born a human being. And not just any human being in the history of human beings, but a human being that gets to be alive today. That gets to listen to all kinds of music, that gets to eat food from every culture, that gets to download porn off the internet. So really, you have everything to live for. [pause] Do you feel better?
Kip: Not really.

Share this quote on facebook Dr. Weathers: You don't feel normal?
Charlie:My family has a psychiatrist on call, how normal can I be?

Share this quote on facebook Marilyn: Well maybe there's more to high school than being well-liked.
Charlie: Like what, specifically?
Marilyn: [pauses to think] Nothing comes to mind.

Share this quote on facebook Popularity is a state of mind.

Share this quote on facebook When Charlie Bartlett listens everyone talks.

Share this quote on facebook First come. First cured.