Da Mayor
Radio Raheem
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Let me tell you the story of right hand-left hand. It's a tale of good and evil. Hate: it was with this hand that Cain iced his brother. Love: these five fingers, they go straight to the soul of man. The right hand: the hand of love. The story of life is this: static. One hand is always fighting the other hand, and the left hand is kicking much ass. I mean, it looks like the right hand—Love—is finished. But hold on, stop the presses; the right hand is coming back. Yeah, he got the left hand on the ropes now, that's right. Ooh, it's a devastating right and Hate is hurt. He's down. Left-Hand Hate KO-ed by Love.
Tina
Mister Senor Love Daddy
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Yes, children, this is the cool-out corner. We're slowing it down for all the lovers in the house. I'll be giving you all the help you need. Musically, that is.
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My people, my people, what can I say; say what I can. I saw it but didn't believe it; I didn't believe what I saw. Are we gonna live together? Together, are we gonna live?
Other
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Sweet Dick Willie: Hell no, goddamnit! Sal ain't did nothin to you before, man, and me neither! Hear me? What you oughta do is boycott that goddamn barber that fucked up your head!
Dialogue
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Buggin' Out: You the man.
Mookie: No, you the man.
Buggin' Out: You the man.
Mookie: No, you the man.
Buggin' Out: No, I'm just a struggling black man trying to keep my dick hard in a cruel and harsh world.
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Mookie: Pino, fuck you, fuck your fucking pizza, and fuck Frank Sinatra.
Pino: Yeah? Well, fuck you, too, and fuck Michael Jackson.
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Da Mayor: Doctor.
Mookie: C'mon, what? What?
Da Mayor: Always do the right thing.
Mookie: That's it?
Da Mayor: That's it.
Mookie: I got it. I'm gone.
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Radio Raheem: Give me 20 "D" Energizers.
Sonny: 20 "C" Energizers?
Radio Raheem: Not "C", "D".
Sonny: "C" Energizers?
Radio Raheem: "D", motherfucker, "D". Learn to speak English first, all right?
Kim: How many you say?
Radio Raheem: 20, motherfucker, 20.
Sonny: Motherfuck you.
Radio Raheem: Motherfuck you? You, you all right, man.
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Mother-Sister: Hey, you old drunk! What did I tell you about drinking in front of my stoop? Move on. You're blocking my view. You are ugly enough. Don't stare at me. The Evil eye doesn't work on me.
Da Mayor: Mother-Sister, you've been talking about me for 18 years. What have I ever done to you?
Mother-Sister: You a drunk fool.
Da Mayor: Besides that. Da Mayor don't bother nobody and nobody bother Da Mayor but you. The man just tends to his own business. I love everybody. I even love you.
Mother-Sister: Hold your tongue. You don't have that much love.
Da Mayor: One day, you're gonna be nice to me. We may both be dead and buried, but you're gonna be nice; at least civil.
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Buggin' Out: You almost knocked me down, man. The word is "Excuse me".
Clifton: Ah, excuse me. I'm sorry.
Buggin' Out: Not only did ya knock me down, you stepped on my brand-new white Air Jordans I just bought, and that's all you can say is "Excuse me"?
Clifton: What, are you serious?
Buggin' Out: Yeah, I'm serious. I'll fuck you up quick two times.
Punchy: Two times.
Buggin' Out: Who told you to step on my sneakers? Who told you to walk on my side of the block? Who told you to be in my neighborhood?
Clifton: I own this brownstone.
Buggin' Out: Who told you to buy a brownstone on my block, in my neighborhood, on my side of the street? Yo, what you wanna live in a black neighborhood for, anyway? Man, motherfuck gentrification.
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Mookie: You dago, wop, guinea, garlic breath, pizza slinging, spaghetti bending, Vic Damone, Perry Como, Luciano Pavarotti, Sole Mio, non-singing motherfucker.
Pino: You gold teeth, gold chain wearing, fried chicken and biscuit eating, monkey, ape, baboon, big thigh, fast running, high jumping, spear chucking, three-hundred-sixty-degree basketball dunking, titsun, spade, mulignan. Take your fucking pizza piece and go the fuck back to Africa.
Stevie: You little slanty eyed, me-no-speaky-American, own-every-fruit-and-vegetable-stand-in-New-York, bullshit, Reverend Sun Myung Moon, Summer Olympic '88, Korean kickboxing son-of-a-bitch.
Officer Long: You Goya bean eating, fifteen-in-a-car, thirty-in-an-apartment, pointed shoes, red wearing, Menudo, mira-mira Puerto Rican cocksucker. Yeah, you!
Sonny: It's cheap! I got a good price for you, Mayor Koch, "How-I'm-doing?", chocolate egg cream drinking, bagel and lox, B'nai B'rith, Jew asshole.
Mister Señor Love Daddy: Yo! Hold up! Time out!
Time out! Y'all take a chill! Ya need to cool that shit out! And that's the double truth, Ruth!
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Mother-Sister: Good morning.
Da Mayor: Is it a good morning?
Mother-Sister: Yes, indeed. You almost got yourself killed last night.
Da Mayor: I've done that before. Where did you sleep?
Mother-Sister: I didn't.
Da Mayor: Hope the block is still standing.
Mother-Sister: We're still standing.
Cast