I Love You, Man (2009)

Share this quote on facebook Toates Magotes

Share this quote on facebook Slappa da bass

Share this quote on facebook Zoey, you are about to marry one of the most honest, kind and fun-loving people I've ever had the honor of knowing. The Pistol is a pleasure giver that's for sure. So beautiful Zoey, give it back. Yeah? [winks] Return the favor. And if you do, I guarantee that you will have a beautiful and pleasure filled union.

Share this quote on facebook THIS IS MY NIGHTMARE!

Share this quote on facebook Joyce Klaven: Peter always connected better with women.
Zoey: You know, I can see that because he is a great boyfriend.
Peter: Thank you fiancee.
Oswald Klaven: Also, you got to understand, Zooey, Peter matured sexually at a very early age. I remember taking him swimming when he was twelve-years-old, kid had a bush like a forty-year-old Serbian.
Peter: Oh come on!
Zoey: Good to know.
Oswald: Kid had a Speedo full of Brillo.

Share this quote on facebook Peter: I'm Peter Klaven, I'm the realtor.
Sydney: Hey, check out these two. That guy needs to fart.
Peter: He does seem to be clenching.
Sydney: Watch the leg. Boom!
Peter: He farted in my open house.
Sydney: He sure did. Look at him, crop dusting across your open house.

Share this quote on facebook Man In Open House: [after trying to discreetly fart at an open house] I like it, but I'm not sure about the space...I'm thinking it might be a little bit small.
Sydney: Totally, and it smells like fart. Make sure you roll down the windows on the way home, sweetheart.

Share this quote on facebook Sydney: [on phone] Just meet me at Muscle Beach in like... I don't know... half an hour?
Peter: Muscle Beach. Half an hour. I will see you there or I will see you on another time.
Sydney: That was very confusing. I don't know if you're gonna come or not.
Peter: No, I'll be there. I'll be there.
Sydney: [laughing] Alright I'll see you then, buddy.
Peter: Alright. Laters on the menjay. [Hangs up] What did I just say?

Share this quote on facebook Sydney: Society tells us we're civilized, but the truth is we are animals. Sometimes we just have to let it out. Try it.
Peter: Blaaah!
Sydney: Good. Now gently remove your tampon and try again.

Share this quote on facebook Sydney: You get home safe, Pistol.
Peter: You got it, Joben.
Sydney: I'm sorry, what?
Peter: Er...nothing.
Sydney: No, what did you say?
Peter: Nah, I don't know. You nicknamed me Pistol, and I just called you..."Joben". It means nothing. I don't...I'm drunk, I'm gonna call a cab.

Share this quote on facebook Sydney: Wait, you jerked off to a picture of your own girlfriend? You - that - wow, that is sick! Oh my God, what is wrong with you?
Peter: What's wrong with that?
Sydney: Pedro, there is so much wrong - I don't even know where to begin... That is sick, man!

Share this quote on facebook Doug: I just wish I could take back that kiss...
Sydney: Woah!
Doug: ...because now I know it was the taste of betrayal.
Peter: It wasn't the taste of betrayal!
Doug: It was the taste of betrayal.
Peter: It wasn't the ta...
Doug: It was the taste of betrayal... you fucking whore!
[Storms off]
Peter: I can actually explain that.
Sydney: I would love to hear that!

Share this quote on facebook Peter: Look man, you told my fiancee she needs to give me bloweys, in front of my whole family. Alright? You owe me.
Sydney: You make a valid point.

Share this quote on facebook Peter: Hey Mel? Do you have any plans on June 30th?
Mel: I'm 89 years old, what the fuck kind of plans would I have?

Share this quote on facebook Peter: I love you, man.
Sydney: I love you, too, bud.
Peter: I love you, dude.
Sydney: I love you, Bro Montana.
Peter: I love you, Holmes.
Sydney: I love you, Broseph Goebbels.
Peter: I love you, muchacha.
Sydney: I love you, Tycho Brohe.