Short Circuit (1986)

Share this quote on facebook Number 5... is alive!

Share this quote on facebook Malfunction! Need input!

Share this quote on facebook No disassemble!

Share this quote on facebook Attractive. Nice software!

Share this quote on facebook Squash, dead. Disassemble, dead. Disassemble...! [panics] DEAD!!

Share this quote on facebook Frankie, ya broke the unwritten law. Ya ratted on your friends. You do that, Frankie, your enemies don't respect ya. You got no friends no more. You got nobody, Frankie. [normal voice] Pretty good, huh?

Share this quote on facebook Jerk of the world, turkey, idiot, pain in the ass!

Share this quote on facebook Colt 45, semi-automatic. [crushes colt] Clay dough.

Share this quote on facebook [sees Number 5 in her truck at night] Oh, my God! I knew they'd pick me. I just knew it!

Share this quote on facebook Originally I had non-military purposes in mind. I designed it as a marital aid.

Share this quote on facebook [tells a joke to Number 5] There's a priest, a minister, and a rabbi. They're out playing golf, and they're trying to decide how much to give to charity. So the priest says, "We'll draw a circle on the ground, we'll throw the money way up in the air, and whatever lands inside the circle, we give to charity." The minster says no. "We'll draw a circle on the ground, throw the money way up in the air, and whatever lands outside of the circle, that's what we'll give to charity." The rabbi says "No, no, no. We'll throw the money way up in the air, and whatever God wants, he keeps!"

Share this quote on facebook Eat my dust, Newton Crosby. Let us break wind! [retreats]

Share this quote on facebook Ben: "Unable. Malfunction".
Howard: How can it refuse to turn itself off?
Skroeder: Maybe it's pissed off.
Crosby: It's a machine, Skroeder. It doesn't get pissed off. It doesn't get happy, it doesn't get sad, it doesn't laugh at your jokes.
Ben and Crosby: It just runs programs.
Howard: It usually runs programs.

Share this quote on facebook Howard: [after Number 5 refuses to return to base] Oh, my God. It's not coming back. We've gotta destroy it.
Crosby: No. Howard, you're overreacting. You can't.
Ben: Look, let us at least try to catch it first.
Crosby: Yeah. We'll panic later. Okay?
Howard: What if you don't catch it? What if it goes out and melts down a busload of nuns?! How would you like to write the headline on that one?!
Ben: "Nun Soup"?
Crosby: BEN! [covers Ben's mouth]

Share this quote on facebook Crosby: Where are you from, anyway?
Ben: Bakersfield, originally.
Crosby: No, I mean your ancestors.
Ben: Oh, them. Pittsburgh.

Share this quote on facebook Howard: Hey! Who told you you could take Number 1?!
Crosby: Howard, logically, if we need protection from Number 5, this is the best weapon we could have.
Howard: Great. Great! So, instead of $11,000,000 on the loose, we're gonna have 22.
Ben: And plus, we are needing gas money.

Share this quote on facebook Howard: I got a phone call from that loony in the lunch wagon. She wants to see you. Only you.
Crosby: She does?
Ben: Oh, her pants are blazing for you, Newton Crosby!
Crosby: Will you grow up?!

Share this quote on facebook My personal theory is that he is this babe in the woods with a real problem. I think he resonates in the way that a really good kid film…I think he resonates because he’s like a little kid, and he has this enormous problem because people are trying to kill him, and his problem is that he can’t convince him that he’s alive. That’s my feeling, is that kids relate to Johnny 5 because he’s got this problem and nobody will listen to him and I think that’s how kids feel.

Share this quote on facebook Something wonderful has happened...No. 5 is alive.

Share this quote on facebook Life is not a malfunction.

Share this quote on facebook John Garber - Otis

Share this quote on facebook Penny Santon - Mrs. Cepeda

Share this quote on facebook Vernon Weddle - General Washburne